Compromise

Compromise

I have been married almost forty-two years. I don't think there is much about our marriage relationship that is not saturated with compromise. Right from the beginning there were issues that needed addressing. I am told that when the oldest child of one family marries the oldest child of another family that relationship, if it is to survive, needs a large dose of compromise.

The word compromise is a compound word from Latin: com means “with” and promise means “a declaration to do something.” Compromise is the ability to combine qualities of two different points of view. For any relationship to endure it must master the art of compromise. My way or the highway is the road to disaster.

I write this blog sitting on the patio of our town home. For fourteen years Judy and I have practiced the art of compromise as we built the patio. Judy wanted all grass; I wanted a raised deck. Judy wanted a large garden with perennials; I wanted a design with less weeding. Judy wanted a wood pergola; I wanted a retractable awning. Well you get the idea.

After much disagreement, we saw that unless we could reach some compromises, there never would be a patio. It took several years of indecision before we were able to move forward. Judy got her beautiful garden and I got the raised deck. Judy got some beautiful patio furniture and I got the retractable awning. With all the “I wants” behind us, we now have a wonderful patio.

The art of compromise has blessed my life. Here is what the Bible says about one of those blessings: “Live happily with the woman you love through the fleeting days of life, for the wife God gives you is your best reward down here for all your earthly toil.” Amen!