Rancor

Rancor

Every once in a while, on the daily dog walk, a particular word pops into my head. This has happened enough that I now pay attention. Although each word is distinct, some are familiar, some are old Latin words from my seminary training, and some I barely recognize. The title of this blog fits into the last category.

Looking up the word rancor in the dictionary, I found this definition: bitter, deep seated ill will. This English word is derived from the Latin meaning: rank smell or taste. The word rancid comes from the same root. Its synonyms aren’t much better: bad blood, bitterness, hostility and enmity.

Watching the news and logging on to social media, I sense that rancor is seeping into the fabric of our culture. No longer is it acceptable to express diverse points of view without sharp and vulgar responses bordering on blatant name calling and personal attack. Rancor is on the increase.

As a pastor I get thrown into family and church dynamics where strong opinions and intense personalities weigh heavy on relationships. Not being one to shy away from conflict, I have participated in familial and ecclesiastical battles that have taken emotional and spiritual tolls on my life. I have also seen collateral damage to families and churches that, in the heat of battle, ignored civility and common decency to win a battle.

It must be age and experience that has taught me to be a better listener as well as more sensitive to convictions of others. I confess that it is a difficult discipline to learn but the rewards are far better. I have learned that listening with respect is not necessarily agreeing. It validates the person expressing a view that I may not share.

Here are some words of Jesus: “You’re blessed when you can show people how to cooperate instead of compete or fight. That’s when you discover who you really are, and your place in God’s family.”

No place for rancor in God’s family!