Tears

Tears

Not sure when it started. Maybe two years ago I noticed that once in a while, I would tear up. Not sobs but just tear leakage. At first, I couldn’t figure out why. Maybe it was the dry climate I live in. Could it be that I was having a slow brain or sinus leakage through my eyes. No that didn’t sound right.

Years ago, I had cataract surgery on both eyes. What a wonderful miracle; twenty-twenty vision, something I never had before. Everything was bright and colorful. My doctor told me that there would be some tearing as my eyes healed from the surgery. But that was a long time ago.

No, I haven’t been watching the Hallmark movies with Judy. She keeps pleading with me to overindulge on those Christmas dramas that begin in July and never seem to end. That’s not me. I am more of an action movie kind of guy where in the end everybody dies except the hero (sometimes he/ she dies too). Never a tear shed.

To be honest, I think the tearing has to do with coming to grips with emotions. I grew up in a world where a man doesn’t cry, no matter what. The few times I did cry in public, I was called a sissy; something no man wants to be labeled. At the other end of life, I don’t have to hide those tears.

Not feeling completely comfortable emoting in public, I can’t help myself as I hold our newborn granddaughter. More than a tear or two leaks down my cheek as hold such precious life in my arms. When I read or hear some great or very sad news, tears drip onto my face. Recently I heard someone say, “When you are crying, you are healing.” I believe it.

Did you know that the shortest verse in the Bible has to do with tears. In John’s Gospel, as he tells the story of the death of Lazarus, Jesus’ close friend,  he writes these two words “Jesus wept.” That’s what it means to be human: to shed tears of joy and sorrow. No need to hide them.